you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
