Me. At least after what I've been through.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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