Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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