I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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