I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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