he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
she peed on how many people?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
