I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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