Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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