It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Randomize
