what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
