I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
