i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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