Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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