sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
