i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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