Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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