so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
