you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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