It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
