How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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