i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
My vagina is officially offended.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
