So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Randomize
