how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize