he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
All the doctor said was why
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
