perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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