take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
