Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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