When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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