I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
