Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
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