somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
