If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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