everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I woke up under a house in Key West
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