Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
