I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
