how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
