I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
