Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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