we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
