Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
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