Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
