Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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