I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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