He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
