even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
