Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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