? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
