what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
