Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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