Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
