Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
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